Sex without Regret: checking in with "Head, Heart, Body"

How do I know when I am ready for sex? How do I know what sexual activities I am comfortable with? How will I know what my boundaries are?

The answer to these questions is different for every person.

Deciding what you feel comfortable doing or “how far” you want to go is a personal choice that you have to make each and every time you become physically or emotionally involved with another person. Having a physical desire to enjoy sexual pleasure is not the same thing as being emotionally prepared for sex with another person.


Head, Heart, Body

A handy tool to help you with healthy sexual decision making! Basically, it means checking in with your thoughts, your feelings and your physical body.

To make a well considered decision about sexual activity, all three aspects need to be checked each time someone makes a decision to have sex:


Head – Ask yourself:
Why am I doing this?
Do I agree with what is going on?
Does this fit with my values?
How will I feel about this decision tomorrow?

Heart – Ask yourself:
Do I feel safe and comfortable with this person?
Does this feel right to me?
Do I like this person?
Can I trust them?

Body – Ask yourself:
What does my body want to do?
Are the juices flowing?
Do I like what’s happening?
Am I, and is my partner protected from STIs or pregnancy?


Watch our SexPerts walk us through their funny demonstration of "Head, Heart, Body" in this podcast:

It’s important to know you have the right to change your mind and stop a sexual activity at any point while its happening, and it is your partner’s responsibility to respect that.

Likewise, it is also your responsibility to check in with your partner and to respect their feelings about a situation if they want to stop, slow down or take a break to sort out their thoughts.

For more helpful tips, check our website at: http://www.calgarysexualhealth.ca/am_i_ready_for_sex.html

National Volunteer Week: Thank you to our volunteers!

Volunteering is the ultimate exercise in democracy.  You vote in elections once a year, but when you volunteer, you vote every day about the kind of community you want to live in.  -- Author Unknown

 

 

In the 4 years since our volunteer program began, we have had the privilege of working with an incredibly dedicated and enthusiastic network of volunteer allies.

In addition to assisting with our outreach work at community events and helping to operate our Sexual Health Resource Centre, volunteers have been very active behind the scenes in our library, entering data, making buttons and helping with many other administrative tasks.

 

And of course our volunteer Board of Directors are a vital source of support and guidance for our organization.

 

The support we receive from our volunteers is crucial to our ability to provide the level and range of services that we do in the Calgary community.

 

 

We are very proud to have such a diverse and highly dedicated team backing us up at every turn.

 

From all of us at CSHC, thank you to our fantastic volunteers!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never doubt that a small group of committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. --Margaret Mead

And be sure to watch this short video by Volunteer Canada in celebration of National Volunteer Week. It is truly inspiring to think about the huge impact that volunteers make in all of our lives every day!

"WiseGuyz" program featured on CTV News in response to rape culture

Our WiseGuyz program coordinator Blake Spence was interviewed by CTV News in the wake of the response to Rehtaeh Parsons' suicide. Blake discusses the concept of "rape culture" in our society and how our WiseGuyz program is working with young men to change it.

Blake explains the importance of a program like WiseGuyz:

"There is a lot of work out there that has been focused on women’s reproductive health. There are lots of programs for young women available. But there aren’t the same number of programs for young men.

 

We wanted to fill that gap, and so the WiseGuyz program is a program for Grade 9 guys — 14- and 15-year-old guys — that teaches them what a healthy relationship is, all about sexual health, consent, what’s considered sexual assault. And how to have a healthy relationship now and in the future."

Here's the full clip from CTV News:


http://www.ctvnews.ca/video?clipId=902932&binId=1.810401&playlistPageNum=1

To learn more about our WiseGuyz program - which works with junior and senior high boys to better understand healthy sexuality, consent, healthy relationships and more - check this blog post.